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“They ate till they had more than enough, for He had given them what they craved.” -Psalm 78:29I’ve been so encouraged recently to watch relationships with people in our church community continue to grow and deepen. Last Tuesday evening at our monthly dinner party, the atmosphere seemed to feel a lot like home – where people were laughing, eating and sharing stories together; a place where each person is accepted just as they are and where their words matter. I get excited when I see things like this because I truly believe that finding and experiencing such relationships and community in life is like coming home to a place our hearts are always in desperate search of.
When we set out on this journey several months ago, I can’t tell you how many times I was warned about the difficulties we would face when it came to carrying out our vision…one that emphasizes relationships over programs; one that is driven not by doing church, but by being church. And as we continue to build and deepen our relationships with one another, I see our love growing as we continue to move toward our mission to extend the life and love of Christ to our surrounding community.
So what’s the problem with carrying-out such a vision?
Relationships can be messy sometimes, can’t they? In fact, when it comes to offering a relationship to someone (one that includes your heart and your love), we can easily find ourselves in a dangerous place. Why? As the famous song so appropriately puts it:
Love hurts, love scars, Love wounds, and mars any heart. Not tough or strong enough to take a lot of pain, take a lot of pain. Love is like a cloud, holds a lot of rain. Love hurts……ooh, ooh love hurts
Once you open yourself to a new relationship, you not only add the opportunity for things like authenticity, honesty, depth, acceptance and love; you also add the opportunity for hurt and betrayal. That’s the danger we face in relationships, in becoming a relational community…and maybe that’s why we sometimes find ourselves running from such things. But to run from something your heart craves (because God created us with a relational-need, to Him and to others) is maddening. It’s simply a risk we MUST take to survive and find satisfaction and fulfillment in life.
Discussing this issue with our Core Team Sunday stirred my heart to keep standing for something I passionately believe in…that relationships are what matter most to God, and though they can be dangerous and difficult to manage at times, there’s nothing our hearts need more than a place where we find ourselves unafraid, where we belong, where we can rest and feel the warmth of the love of God through the love of others.
May Awaken be such a place, where we find home in the unchanging love of God, in the fellowship of walking with Jesus and with friends, and in giving ourselves away freely to our neighbors and God’s mission to bring every heart home to Him.
craving intimacy
Have you ever had an unexplainable loneliness even while standing in the middle of a crowd? I heard a friend say several times recently that he doesn’t need anymore acquaintances in his life, that there is no more room for such relationships. He desires friendships that go much deeper than that, friendships that are authentic, real, transparent, intimate. People who he will be there for, and who, in turn, will be there for him. I agree.
Think about your own life. Who are those ‘deep’ friendships you share, those deeper than merely ‘acquaintances?’ Who are the people in whom you are investing yourself and who are investing themselves in you? Who are the people you are walking with through life, who make you better, who even perhaps sharpen you spiritually?
One evening last week, a group of people I’m beginning to count more and more as my ‘deep’ friends (people who are also in our church community) spent some time together bowling. We had a blast laughing together (and not so much at each other), applauding and giving high-fives, encouraging each other and enjoying the unique personalities each person possesses. It was also a surreal evening as we all watched Molly dominate us on the lanes! I was humbled.
Bowling that evening was one of those moments where things deeper than community are formed. Relationships are deepened and become more intimate. People develop meaningful, more authentic relationships as they share their lives together; relationships that go beyond simply the people you go to church with, to a holistic-level in life. These are the people I’m beginning a new spiritual journey with, the people I’m walking with and sharing my life with. And that’s our vision with Awaken…a community of people in deep relationship, who walk together and who live out the very meaning of koinonia, the Greek term for Christian Fellowship as it should be.
Looking at God’s Word, I’m convinced these types of relationships – ‘deep’ friendships – are what our souls crave. But to have these types of relationships require that we give more of ourselves away, including our hearts and our love…and that can be risky. Yet, that’s how God created us, because the more we love, the more our love expands, the closer it leads us to God.
Is your soul finding satisfaction in your relationships? Who are you walking with? Who can you go deeper with? Listen to your soul…
Chris Shelton resides in Greensboro with his wife, Molly, their daughter, Julia, and Baby #2 due in March...
